Break Free from Perfectionism: Embrace Imperfections
“The harder you try to be perfect, the less likely you’ll accomplish your goals.” ― Jon Acuff
Most of us have some type of relationship with perfectionism. It could be a good relationship where there is balance, a level of freedom to honestly evaluate your situations and push forward. Or it could be a bad relationship where perfectionism dominates and is continually working to hold you back. If our friends saw us with that type of person in real life, they would advise us that we need to get out of that relationship and move on. This is no different. Everyone needs a healthy relationship with their perfectionism persona.
This is a subject that I like to come back to. It is very relatable and for me, it can be therapeutic to work through my ongoing challenges with perfectionism. In a previous article, 5 Tips From a Recovering Perfectionist, I shared some ideas I use to balance my relationship with perfectionism. It is still hard to not let that get out of control or limit what that thought process allows you to do.
Perfectionism can make you feel like you are not good enough to share your ideas with others. It can prevent you from taking changes on new ways of working or thinking. It stifles your growth mindset and paves an easier path for the status quo.
I recently listened to Jon Acuff’s podcast, All It Takes is a Goal, episode 23 where he shares his view on perfectionism. He has several episodes that deal with the subject, but this one caught my attention with how he approached it. He embraced his relationship with perfectionism and had a conversation with it. In episode 27, he shared 8 ways to spot perfectionism and how to work through it. An accomplished writer with multiple published books also must deal with his relationship with perfectionism. Jon’s book Finish is about how to ensure you cross the finish line with your goals and your projects. Perfectionism is often the barrier that stands in the way of those achievements.
As leaders, we will have multiple relationships with perfectionism. We have our own, and we get to see it in others. We must live with it ourselves and provide counsel about it. That can be challenging in itself. Here I am sharing ideas on how to manage your relationship with perfectionism, while I am still grappling with my own. That is the beauty of finding the balance with this relationship. If I let it get away from me, there’s no way I would ever write this article, let alone everything else I share on this blog. I’d still be trying to craft the perfect message for article number one (which happened to be on the subject of choice and deciding about how you see the world and the options you always have available).
One of the first steps of working with your relationship with perfectionism is accounting for the situation for yourself or others. Any time we take on something new, there is a change curve that must be considered. Do we approach it with consideration of what the learning period should be based on the amount of time others have done the old thing? If someone has been using the same software for 10 years and the new one for 3 months, is it really fair to believe everyone could change that quickly? How do you build a plan for that? Now, I am not suggesting that it should take 10 years to make a shift from old to new, but depending on the situation, scale, or scope of the change, you have to be realistic on the timeline for change.
The most important part is that you should not hold back making the change because it will not be perfect right away. Define your timeline, account for the learning curve, and set things into motion. Excellence begins with the first step. Excellence is built and realized through practice, patience, and perseverance. You must push through when the relationship with perfectionism gets tough or out of balance. Never lose sight of what can be possible. Seek help and then adjust to the situations you find yourself in. It requires getting your relationship back in check to allow excellence to triumph over the grips of perfectionism.
How do you manage your relationship with perfectionism?
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